I've been camping out in this "rut" for awhile now. I know, I know: good Christians who love Jesus don't get in ruts. They just go through valleys and allow God to come alongside them during the low points so they can learn to trust Him more and witness the beauty of redemption and blah blah blah. Okay, so all of that is true. I know it is. But it still sucks.
Every so often, I go into panic mode on what to do with my life. I think the majority of my blog posts have highlighted this. But, this time, I feel like that change will be soon. I don't know whether it's God pushing me to be ready or me just about ready to erupt if things stay the same for much longer. It could be a combination of the two. Over the past couple years, I've learned that I get antsy pretty quickly. For whatever reason, the diehard schedule-hugger that I am loves change. (Well, sometimes.) I like going new places and exploring the unknown. I like getting out of my comfort zone and trying things I've never done before and seeing how God works through all of it. (For an example of this, check out my Alaska blog.) I think God's/I'm prepping myself to do that again... soonish.
I don't remember whether I've talked about this before on this blog, but I've mentioned to a few of you in person that I once applied for The World Race. It's an 11 month mission trip that takes you to minister in 11 different countries. For various reasons, I decided not to go. But that passion for major change and discontent with the status quo has reared its ugly (or beautiful?) head once again, and now I'm seriously considering applying for it. I'm scared to death of raising support ($15,000!), but my heart for world change won't be satisfied until I get off my lazy butt and do something. I think God's been moving me in this direction for awhile... I just chose to take the scenic route. I sure am glad He's patient.
The point of this post is a cry for prayer and words of wisdom. It means the world to me when people tell me they're praying for me - that they are going to the God of the universe, Maker of heaven and earth, and Savior of souls on my behalf. "I'm praying for you" isn't some lame Christian cop-out. It's the ultimate thing you can do! So, everyone, would you pray for me? Would you ask God to open doors for me and my future (whether it's The World Race or something else)? Will you approach Him with confidence for me? Because I sure don't have a lot of confidence right now.
Thank you!
